Sunday, July 31, 2011

Feeling normal........

The past few days have been pretty uneventful.  I have felt almost normal.  It is actually rather odd.  Sometimes I feel like I should be doing nothing but lying in bed crying but I actually feel okay.  There are still tears and sadness but not the mind numbing sadness that was there.  I still ache for what has been taken from us but I am actually  feeling a tad hopeful.  I have been doing A LOT of searching online about Trisomy 13 and it isn't all hopeless.  Yes there are many children who do not make it more than a few hours but there are also quite a few that are living into their teens and beyond.  As much as I do not want to get my hopes up too much it still brings me a little peace that she could make it. 

I have also been feeling more little pops from my Bean.  They always make me smile.  It is like my Quinn-Bean is in there just letting me know that she is still okay.  I really thought that carrying to term would be the hardest thing I would ever do and I am sure I will have my days that it will be but there are also times where it feels like a normal pregnancy.  I still have a precious little baby inside my tummy and that is amazing!  No matter the out come I will cherish her life forever, no longer how long or short.  She has changed my life in so many ways. 


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